Monday, 09 February 2009
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Maxwell hates his diabetes and his shots. He does not want anyone to know. He is ashamed. It breaks my heart so bad. Today his blood sugar was very high at church. We sat in the foyer and kept making him walk around but his sugar kept going up. I'm all new at this and I did not know what to do. I left my book at home that tells me what to do. I am very confused. I know it has only been a week and I'll learn.
Tonight I'm very sad. I just got news that Maxwell will not be able to be in a clinical study in Gainesville Florida because we were too cheap to save our boys embilical cord blood. I feel like such a bad mom. I can't stop crying. I know God is sovereign but that doesn't mean I don't regret things. I regret so much tonight. I wish we were near our families. It is very lonely to be away from family during tough times. Even if my family is off in good times, they are great during bad times. I could tell my mom I'm scared and she'd hug me. Sometimes it is hard to be a Christian because if you say "I'm scared", people say don't worry the word of God says not to worry. Honestly I'm scared and I know God will care for my boy but I'm scared of what that looks like. I know that sounds bad but I'm not looking to be perfect any time soon.
-Please pray that Steve gets a job this week. Kathryn has been fabulous to us and we are grateful but we need to be closer to either chattanooga, Baltimore or Boston for Maxwell's treatment.
-Please pray that Maxwell be ok with his shots.
-Please pray for Jacob and Maxwell to be close friends.
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Comments (3)
Who saves their kids umbilical cord blood? That's crazy! Praying for your family.
Our friends Neil and Liz did. They pay a fee yearly for it to be frozen. We were offered it with Maxwell but alas we did not think we'd need it.
@jakemaxmom - Heather honey! I wish I could be there to give you all a hug, It might not do you so much good, but it would me. I don't want to say"all" we can do is pray. Because that is the greatest gift we could have. But we still are human. And God knows all about our concerns and I know he understands. My heart goes out to you all. And I know this is some thing new to all of you. I know how you feel about family/ My Mom was a very stern person. But yet she could be so tender and understanding when we needed comfort. I'm praying honey! Not that my prayers are the only ones that reach heaven. But their is strength in unity. love you all dearly